Respectful Connections
By: Clare Thomas Pino
Crescent Moon
As I slide open the barn doors, almost daily I hear that wonderful familiar sound; my filly whinnying to me as she trots across the field to the gate, her gaze focused upon me, eager to connect. My heart leaps, and I feel blessed to have a respectful connection with such a majestic and often quite wild creature.
Humans frequently interact with other living beings with little regard for the non-verbal responses that those they are interacting with are displaying. In the presence of horses, it can be easier to see the impact of our interactions, as they are so large, and at the same time so very sensitive to changes in their environment, and their responses are relatively easy to see, compared to those of humans.
In a desire to learn more about how equine-human interaction could potentially benefit humans, and still be a positive experience for the horses, my undergraduate students and I completed several small-scale research studies. We looked at the early interactions between horses and human, what I call greetings. As seen in the photograph below in many of these studies the ‘greeting’ occurs through an opening in the stall and the horse is free to choose how, when, or if they interact with the human participant. Many of our human participants considered a successful greeting with the horses one in which they make physical connection, the horse consenting to their touch.
Horses interact uniquely
During these studies we noticed each horse had a unique way of interacting with people, a give and take specific to that individual horse, with each human’s behavior at these give and take moments predicting the likelihood the horse would allow themselves to be touched.
Horses interact uniquely
During these studies we noticed each horse had a unique way of interacting with people, a give and take specific to that individual horse, with each human’s behavior at these give and take moments predicting the likelihood the horse would allow themselves to be touched.
Several small-scale studies were done looking into early interactions between horses and humans
Surprising to many of the students, those participants who were successful at achieving the opportunity for touch were those who provided a physical and ‘gaze’ space (similar to the human idea of personal space) for the horses to move away and come back. This was opposed to those who stayed in one place, maintaining a specific posture or gaze focused upon the horse. It appeared the ability to show mutual respect through reflexivity, with the key being awareness of the other beings need for space or readiness for connection, was not something each person possessed.
Respectful connection
I have entitled this article Respectful Connection as I believe this is what we humans need in our lives, and something we can learn through our interactions with horses (or other animals) then bring into our interactions with humans to enrich all of our lives. I feel respectful connections are formed by building trust through positive mutually respectful interactions and can form the building blocks to develop deep connections with other living beings. Working with horses provides the opportunity to self-correct our behaviors in real time, with the receipt of visible and tactile responses from the horses. This allows the humans to respectfully connect and enjoy the immense feeling of wholeness through truly being present and in relationship with another living being.
The basis for respectful connections is awareness: of ourselves, our fears and our potential and our ability to trust ourselves and others. What we think and feel we transmit, and the horse responds to subtle cues we are displaying and changes their behavior as a consequence. Growing up my mother had a golden barn rule. I was never allowed to work with my pony if I was upset, angry or in a ‘mood’. Rather, she said I was to muck out a stall, remove manure from the field, clean tack, or do something that did not involve directly interacting with an equine. My mother wanted to ensure I was not making physical contact with the horses while I was not fully present in the interaction with them.
Using our awareness of self, we then build mutual respect and trust with the horses (and eventually with other humans). Working with horses involves us letting go of our illusion of control. We need to be fully present, place our trust in the horse, allow and honor their trust in us, and when we are worthy of their trust in us we are provided with dependable, safe and positive interactions.
Therefore, to achieve respectful connection, we must be wholeheartedly present, aware of our energy, the energy in the situation, our feelings in the moment, and our impact on other living beings in our presence. It is with this awareness (and its feeling within our being), and the resultant connections we are able to achieve with the equines (and their resultant feeling), which may allow us to take what we have learned in our experience of respectful connection with the horse into the wider world.
Just as in human-human connection, we balance our desire to connect in the experience with the horse, with respect for the equine and their desire for connection, quiet and solitude, and social interaction with other living beings other than themselves. In that human-equine relationship we patiently look forward to feelings of harmony, peace, and truly respectful connections. ~*~ .
I have entitled this article Respectful Connection as I believe this is what we humans need in our lives, and something we can learn through our interactions with horses (or other animals) then bring into our interactions with humans to enrich all of our lives. I feel respectful connections are formed by building trust through positive mutually respectful interactions and can form the building blocks to develop deep connections with other living beings. Working with horses provides the opportunity to self-correct our behaviors in real time, with the receipt of visible and tactile responses from the horses. This allows the humans to respectfully connect and enjoy the immense feeling of wholeness through truly being present and in relationship with another living being.
The basis for respectful connections is awareness: of ourselves, our fears and our potential and our ability to trust ourselves and others. What we think and feel we transmit, and the horse responds to subtle cues we are displaying and changes their behavior as a consequence. Growing up my mother had a golden barn rule. I was never allowed to work with my pony if I was upset, angry or in a ‘mood’. Rather, she said I was to muck out a stall, remove manure from the field, clean tack, or do something that did not involve directly interacting with an equine. My mother wanted to ensure I was not making physical contact with the horses while I was not fully present in the interaction with them.
Using our awareness of self, we then build mutual respect and trust with the horses (and eventually with other humans). Working with horses involves us letting go of our illusion of control. We need to be fully present, place our trust in the horse, allow and honor their trust in us, and when we are worthy of their trust in us we are provided with dependable, safe and positive interactions.
Therefore, to achieve respectful connection, we must be wholeheartedly present, aware of our energy, the energy in the situation, our feelings in the moment, and our impact on other living beings in our presence. It is with this awareness (and its feeling within our being), and the resultant connections we are able to achieve with the equines (and their resultant feeling), which may allow us to take what we have learned in our experience of respectful connection with the horse into the wider world.
Just as in human-human connection, we balance our desire to connect in the experience with the horse, with respect for the equine and their desire for connection, quiet and solitude, and social interaction with other living beings other than themselves. In that human-equine relationship we patiently look forward to feelings of harmony, peace, and truly respectful connections. ~*~ .
Clare Thomas Pino Bio
Clare has a background in Psychology & Animal Behavior. She works for the University of Maine System and Husson University teaching, researching and mentoring students in psychology, counseling, animal behavior, eco-therapies, AAAT (Animal Assisted Activities and Therapies) and Anthrozoology.
In addition to her onsite teaching (in Orono and Bangor, Maine, USA) Clare has offered online graduate level courses in Animal Assisted Activities and Therapies and Anthrozoology through Univeristy of Southern Maine since Fall 2018. Clare is a former board member for EFMHA (Equine Facilitated Mental Health Association – Now PATH International) and an HHRF (Horses and Humans Research Foundation) scientific advisor.
Clare lives with her family and animals on a lovely 70-acre diversified farm just outside of Bangor, Maine where she strongly supports organic farming and gardening as well as grass-fed humane livestock production. Clare has been around equines for more than 4 decades and sees the immense value in being truly and respectfully present with equines and nature.
Clare can be contacted at: ctphumananimal@gmail.com